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Unless Redux (Free verse) by rahson_s
Unless I'm not talking about my woman, and I was referring to you, that would change the whole view of the picture I just painted, you'll think of me more, might even wet yourself on lonely saturday nights, daydreaming your time away, thinking of me, I'm sure you've thought about what sex would be like with me, I'm sure you see something in me that others can't see, I allowed myself to open up, enabling my words to live free, my heart is only human, my door is always open, unless, I just enjoy making women smile, whether that be you or her, either way I'm loved by both of you, being that I only have one life to live I just wanted to bring more smiles than tears, I want women to know I was here, I loved and I was loved in return, only through good conversation, great sex and my words will you ever understand me, unless, I'm fooling myself, as if marriage and love doesn't hurt as is, why should I put myself in a position where I can lose everything I worked hard for, every word said, every kiss, every feeling of please never end, I can't help but begin to wonder what my life would be like if I made that mistake of marrying someone I loved but weren't able to complete the task ahead, a whole life spent with one woman, a protector to her and our children, a husband to a woman I cherish, however life is full of lust, blow jobs and black kisses, crackers, niggas and spics, I live this, every single day I'm confronted with these decisions, I'm deeply in love, unless

Up the ladder: Child Shaped Adult
Down the ladder: Get Over It

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.119203
Overall Rank: 5771
Posted: February 11, 2006 7:32 AM PST; Last modified: February 11, 2006 7:32 AM PST
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Comments:
[8] Glasseyez @ 204.49.132.47 | 11-Feb-06/10:08 PM | Reply
it could have done without this "blow jobs and
black kisses, crackers, niggas and spics" maybe reword it some, the rest of the poem I like alot 8
[7] wilco @ 24.92.74.122 | 13-Feb-06/12:50 PM | Reply
I've seen you do better, but not bad. I think, though, if you're going to throw out the racial slurs, just go ahead and say niggers. "Niggas" makes it seem like you're trying to skirt the issue and use slang instead.
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