sensitivity as ruination

I sit here, alone in the dark, crying I know not why I am put here I can't begin to fathom the depth of my loneliness Am I doomed to failure? Can I move forward? Or will I stay and let the past haunt my future? The mornings I hate The days even worse Solace at night, no one around Heart burning inside of me It will explode and take me with it, This I know for certain God help me No one else can or will Let alone me God I hate having a tortured soul The constant plight I find myself in Used and abused Left hallow and miserable And no one the wiser, all on account of me My sensitive and passionate soul God I hate this Why me? What purpose could I possibly have? The stepping stones of emotion are me and I bear the load greatly For if not for the abuse, would I even exist? I think not What else am I good for anyways? God only knows And I am certainly none the wiser Have you ever gotten so down that? You thought you would never get back up again? That's me, all the time, Everyday, it's a battle to keep on going To wake up in the mornings To show myself in public I can't bear the thought of being hurt again And I am hurt day after day And the pain won't stop And the suffering won't end Talk only leads to pain, Back and back again, I don't need talk to visit my pain, All I must do is wake up and begin my day, Crying Its time to sleep, the endless sleep of eternity