poemranker ::Generation Next, Fuck you(The Fake Out) by thepinkbunnyofdoom

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Free verse № 137784

Generation Next, Fuck you(The Fake Out)

by thepinkbunnyofdoom

Member since 2003 · Posted 28 Jan 2006 · Edited 28 Jan 2006 · 8 comments

She hit it twice And said it that was nice So I lay in paradise Watching as she Called out orders With her twirling tongue She called up the reserves Saying the little bastards Got what they deserved Racing off into hi-way traffic With such fearless nerve Down a one way tunnel Toward foreign soil after dark Hoping to hit the right waters You see, You see, A sad set of swimmers Behind her drum's beat March, March, Come Forward, First man to the finish, Lair, Lair, Race on, faster, faster, Bang, Bang, Blast off the cannon Welcome, Welcome Lair, Lair Swim on, swim on, Close, close Here it comes Surprise, Surprise Lake of fire

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mean 6.88 weighted 5.50 rank 2673 views 311 View voting details →

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8 comments

[n/a] Ranger 29-Jan-06/1:40 PM Reply
This one's tricky to comment on; a lot of people have looked at it according to the hits counter, but I can only assume that they, like I, don't really know what to make of it. It feels like it's a good poem, but it's more than my tiny brain can get round at the moment. If you gave me an explanation, maybe that would help.
[8] ecargo 30-Jan-06/10:20 AM Reply
Okay--think I get it. Do the swimmers think they're swimming someplace else; is that it? Lake of fire = stomach acids (as opposed to more welcoming ground)?

Must be the month for blowjob poems, huh? ;-D
[8] ALChemy › ecargo 30-Jan-06/11:57 AM Reply
Good call. At first I thought it was a bong thing but I think you aced this one.
[n/a] thepinkbunnyofdoom › ecargo 30-Jan-06/2:15 PM Reply
You hit it on the head(No pun intended). As for the month for blowjob poems, thats more next month.

;-)

<3 Jason
[4] LilMsLadyPoet 31-Jan-06/10:19 AM Reply
Is this one of your sex poems, one of your war-commentary poems, or a drug poem? Or 'the ignorance and bliss of unknowing the young possess'?
"And said it that was nice"> wanna fix that? (that it?)(said it was nice?)(And said,"That was nice.")?
[n/a] thepinkbunnyofdoom › LilMsLadyPoet 31-Jan-06/9:51 PM Reply
It is everything that was in my head at one moment, at one time. Flames of thought, burning bright, junping torch to torch in death, lighting dark recesses, buried beneath a coat of dust, being swept away, to be poured down the drain, as you question, these strange breath's that I call an answer, are merely images captured by a floating attention span, traslated to text in my passing with a computer screen.

<3 Jason
[4] LilMsLadyPoet › thepinkbunnyofdoom 2-Feb-06/7:16 AM Reply
Okay...you cleared that up...
now post THAT reply (as a poem), so I can vote on IT!...it is as good as, and better than, some stuff I've seen on here!
[5] Edna Sweetlove 19-May-06/4:49 AM Reply
OK I suppose.