Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

lip balm (Free verse) by FreeFormFixation
a strawberry pachinko ball bounces like a blueberry. banana flavored cover-alls are bad to wear by monkeys. apple jelly handcuffs keep a criminal trapped and healthy, cheese-wigs are a bad idea if mice live in your belfry.

Up the ladder: Monogamy
Down the ladder: Bush Fire

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 4.3333335
Weighted score: 4.9205313
Overall Rank: 9510
Posted: December 28, 2005 12:34 AM PST; Last modified: December 28, 2005 12:34 AM PST
View voting details
Comments:
[4] Sisterwolf @ 207.69.137.20 | 28-Dec-05/7:01 PM | Reply
Cute. Maybe a stretch for rhyme though, my friend.
line 6 is out of synch... could omit 'trapped and'.
Cheese wigs is not a familiar term to me, so am supposing it is a bug??
[9] zodiac @ 24.148.234.30 | 30-Dec-05/7:12 AM | Reply
A strawberry bounces like a blueberry? That seems kind of sloppy.

"bad to wear by monkeys" needs rephrasing. Otherwise, good.
220 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001