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island nation (Free verse) by skaskowski
she set the coffee pot upon the stove and stoked the flame a bit. then set upon the sofa to unwind and watch her favorite flick. she must have fallen fast asleep the blaze licked off her blushing cheeks. so embarassed and so damn naive. it must have been wes anderson.

Up the ladder: Two words
Down the ladder: Get well soon

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.75
Weighted score: 5.2086053
Overall Rank: 4507
Posted: October 28, 2005 11:25 PM PDT; Last modified: October 28, 2005 11:25 PM PDT
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Comments:
[7] Dovina @ 209.247.222.91 | 29-Oct-05/12:07 PM | Reply
The metaphor works pretty well until the last two lines.
[10] zodiac @ 217.144.7.195 | 30-Oct-05/6:24 AM | Reply
skaskowski nation of islands (free verse)
it placed the container of coffee in
the cooker and it resupplied the flame in a fire
then it placed in the bank
in order to it completes in his sympathy
and in order to it gives the attention
it shakes this it should cases fast in the sleep
it has the fracture of that relaxedly blooming her cheeks
is licked this way and this gullible vloek
ways should it is wes Anderson it is.
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > zodiac | 30-Oct-05/8:19 AM | Reply
It's addictive isn't it?
[n/a] skaskowski @ 70.225.166.245 > zodiac | 31-Oct-05/4:03 AM | Reply
that was cancerous. get it? sign of the zodiac?
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > skaskowski | 31-Oct-05/7:50 AM | Reply
No I'm canserous (July 8). This was probably at one time Russian.
[10] zodiac @ 217.144.7.195 > ALChemy | 1-Nov-05/3:12 AM | Reply
I'm cancer. The best part is "should it is wes Anderson it is."
[n/a] ALChemy @ 24.74.101.159 > zodiac | 1-Nov-05/9:00 AM | Reply
The worst part is I misspelled cancerous. The best part is your version sounds like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs ("It puts the lotion on its skin and puts it back in the bucket again.")
[n/a] INTRANSIT @ 152.163.100.67 | 1-Nov-05/3:02 PM | Reply
Which it is soused hogs face?
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