poemranker ::on a climb by nonee

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Free verse № 13241

on a climb

by nonee

Member since 2002 · Posted 5 Sep 2002 · 2 comments

On a climb to a mountain, took a deep breath. Stopped, to think for a while Will I ever cross it or see the other side, Have been climbing this mountain for so long now Still it seems so high .... I don't think there can be other side For I could have reached it by now . Feeling is still there.. Am I still where I started from ..? Maybe losing faith in me now .. Losing all the hope in me,to see the other side . Still the climb is so high I can sit here and cry... For I am losing the will to try. No, but there is no other way out, For that is all I have learnt, To climb a mountain, that is so high, This mountain of life For my feet won't stop, Untill I reach the other side....

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2 comments

[n/a] vulcan 5-Sep-02/8:41 AM Reply
It's good but "this mountain of life" sorry,makes the whole poem look like a dead metaphor.I'm sure you can state your point in some indirect way as you have done in the rest of it.I'll wait.
[n/a] nonee › vulcan 25-Sep-02/10:09 PM Reply
thanx! but u c when i wrote these verses i was not thinking of one stating one particular point or episode , i was indeed thinking of life as a whole ..so i guess ..but if u feel like, would like to know how u would put it , if u have anything particular in mind