poemranker ::monday v2 by ay deee

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 132113

monday v2

Member since 2005 · Posted 14 Oct 2005 · 8 comments

today is the day had a good rest last night i dreamt i was drafted i was unprepared no tools my sister got out of the truck crying i hugged her she walked around a cluttered house with me amalgam of steps and closets i thought i saw my aunt's spare bedroom a feeling of the place on pine she suggested necessities i struggled to find camo pants, plaid shirt my backpack sagging with a few worthless things ready to accept my lot the enemy was already moving on pine street they knew gunshots fear i woke early made french toast and coffee today is the day a new seat on my bicycle backpack with sketchbook and lunch i am prepared

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 4.00 weighted 4.88 rank 10058 views 172 View voting details →

5 votes so far. Yours would make 6.5 votes so far

8 comments

[n/a] ALChemy 14-Oct-05/1:05 PM Reply
Are you man or woman? Because I've never heard of women being drafted but on the other hand you wear a skirt. Maybe your just Scottish.
[n/a] ay deee › ALChemy 17-Oct-05/8:27 AM Reply
i wear a skirt?
[n/a] Dovina › ay deee 17-Oct-05/6:57 PM Reply
So do I. It's what separates us and gives us that unique, adorable character men cn't resist.
[n/a] ay deee › Dovina 18-Oct-05/6:20 AM Reply
hold on.
what?
what about the words in this poem put a skirt on?
[n/a] ALChemy › Dovina 25-Oct-05/7:59 AM Reply
Yes indeed! Easy access.
[8] zodiac 15-Oct-05/5:53 AM Reply
Can't trust that day.

On a related note, I just watched that movie Elephant last night. Now that's some fucked up shit.
[2] Tintagiles 16-Oct-05/10:42 PM Reply
Yawn yawn yawn.
[n/a] ay deee › Tintagiles 17-Oct-05/8:27 AM Reply
are you sleepy?
can you be specific?
was the first version better?