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Worth (Free verse) by Dovina Consider a tree,s lithe sway
as picture, plan, or metaphor.
Classify its species,
the elements that make it life,
or the values of its wood and shade.
I,m important like a tree,
with buying power of a coin.
But as a person, I hold worth per se,
and submit a tree may too.
If so, then pity its selfish state
unless it knows some being knows
its worth exceeds intrinsic.
Up the ladder:
Marlowe, Raleigh, INTRANSIT (God speaks)
Down the ladder:
Innocence Having Been Lost
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 6.1666665
Posted: July 25, 2005 6:21 AM PDT; Last modified: July 25, 2005 6:21 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.313765 Overall Rank: 3544 Comments:
[8]
Stephen Robins @ 84.13.133.201
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25-Jul-05/11:26 AM
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Reply
I see from this poem that you are still a terribly wounded ditch pig.
[n/a]
Dovina @ 212.74.167.76
> Stephen Robins
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27-Jul-05/5:48 AM
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Reply
Because I pity a selfish tree? If indeed it is selfish.
I enjoyed this very much. 8
And it's look, rude, unbending, lusty, made me think of myself,....
but not quite.
You must know some being knows.
A little punctuation problem but it sounds good. I'm not sure you need "of a coin" in verse 3. You did a good job of avoiding sounding like a tree hugger.
I`m not a tree hugger, though the poem comes close to being so.
I don`see the punctuation problem. I debated the `coin`in verse three, but decided to keep it so the reader could feel like a coin if he-she wants to. A lot of us want to feel like we have buying power.
hmmm....cool...though you lost me on stanza 3.
I am important like a tree is important because I have worth like a tree. I have contribution that people are willing to pay for, like a tree has wood and shade. But I have intrinsic value also, independent of what I produce, at least in the eyes of democracy and the idea of being `endowed by my creator with certain inalienable rights.` Somehow, that is not good enough for me, and I want to be valued for something more tangible.
Being a sex object isn't good enough for ya?
It is good, and I like it. It`s part of having value that is more than intrinsic.
What's with the commas for apostrophes?
A European keyboard is to blame. A need for feedback on such trivialities is not.
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