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I Need Not be Told (Free verse) by Chelsio
When I see you all I can do is stare, I now understand how love is unfair. I swim in your eyes and I melt in your skin, An unbridled passion comes from within. I dream of us together but then I wake, To find what had happened had all been fake. I have never felt so empty inside, And I fear my love will never subside. But I need not be told, I already know, That the love I hope for will never be so.

Down the ladder: Refund

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Arithmetic Mean: 2.0
Weighted score: 4.642391
Overall Rank: 12328
Posted: July 5, 2005 1:59 PM PDT; Last modified: July 5, 2005 1:59 PM PDT
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Comments:
[3] Dovina @ 69.235.21.28 | 5-Jul-05/2:08 PM | Reply
Such a common theme in young writers, so common that to do it well in a poem may me impossible. At the least it would take a fresh approach, which this is not.
[5] Bluemonkey @ 170.141.68.99 | 6-Jul-05/8:13 AM | Reply
better than your other one, I'll give you that.
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