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Sisyphus' wife (Free verse) by Bankrupt_Word_Clerk
You made it clear that My ego is a donkey that is riding me with feelings contaminated with a tragic and swelling pride of vision dimming to the point I can't even see myself through the layers of ego billowing about me like pea soup fog in the Tule basin north of Fresno. and now You stand there wishing that I would color myself disappeared, yet I remain in front of you, gloriously wide and grinning the toothy grin of a man that is either nauseous or unconscious You dress yourself today in the victim's jewelry peeking through your fingers to see if I am tryingto guess which side of the bitches brew you are on.

Up the ladder: sea of pearls
Down the ladder: The Cracks in my Wall

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.4
Weighted score: 5.0476813
Overall Rank: 6888
Posted: June 16, 2005 1:30 AM PDT; Last modified: June 16, 2005 1:30 AM PDT
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Comments:
[5] deleted user @ 81.69.23.196 | 16-Jun-05/4:13 AM | Reply
Shouldn't that be Sisyphus's Wife? If not, my 'Doris's off-day' needs a title revision...
This poem? Totally incomprehensive to me.
[n/a] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ 71.129.180.150 > deleted user | 16-Jun-05/11:49 AM | Reply
http://www.grammarbook.com/punctuation/apostro.asp

Thank you good sir. It does require an additional s.
[7] Dovina @ 69.175.32.185 | 16-Jun-05/12:36 PM | Reply
The first verse makes a clever point, but could do so in half the words. Lines 3-5 are almost repeats.

Verse 2 is good up to "tryingto" and "bitches (bitch's) brew"
[n/a] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ 71.129.180.150 > Dovina | 16-Jun-05/1:42 PM | Reply
bitches is the right word. More than one bitch in this brew. maybe bitches'?
[n/a] zodiac @ 212.118.16.50 > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 18-Jun-05/2:05 AM | Reply
In case you were wondering and couldn't be bothered to check Miles Davis called the famous recording sessions Bitches Brew without an apostrophe. I'd say bitches' brew if I were you.
[n/a] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ 71.129.182.174 > zodiac | 18-Jun-05/12:33 PM | Reply
That is precisely where I got those words... Miles Davis.
[n/a] zodiac @ 213.186.177.137 > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 19-Jun-05/4:50 AM | Reply
Yes. You still want the apostrophe after the s.
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