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The Grand Adjustment (Free verse) by horus8
Ode to The Grand Adjustment,
and the way that it hikes up its skirt
and wants to make baby upon baby
in the suburbs down the street from
the missile factory. The hot-dog plant
that my father was a hot-dog at is
not so hot anymore, and in fact
there was a rave there last weekend
proving that the janitors have all been fired,
and that the rats have taken up new-age-disco,
and hired themselves a DJ from Cincinnati
with more piercings in his face than an
ionized cave magnet, he is white, but has a
degree in African American studies
he is paving the way to a new tomorrow
on jew-jew-bees and ecstasy laxatives.
We are all so hip at the reality tv show Olympics...
Everyone is there being SO realistic
that the stripper from Pittsburgh
ate my penis from a required distance,
and the mimes are in agreement
as the roach coach delivers, and
the people all chitter on the curb
outside the studios on Gower, the
power is in The Grand Adjustment;
As it takes place right before your eyes,
and you let it, and super size while the boys
with the backward baseball caps in the
black BMW's show up, and tell me about
how the gold cow is no longer gold, but in
fact it's now stuffed full of saline, see through
(but only if you can afford prime time glasses),
and thoroughly ready to milk you back. I
track the world and its villains with my
Captain Crunch decoder kit to America, but
it is too late, The Grand Adjustment does not
wait, for you, it makes you wait on it in the
haze of self improvement and magazine
sales, commercials, and pails of diet pop
that can be heard 'a fizz' all the way to Uranus
Lazy well dressed lemmings, and their lemon girls,
with the Angelina Jolie tattoos on their lower backs
whip out cell-phones, and start to flash pictures, and
dish out Barry Mannilow jingles -- make bad movies
of what it's like to wait in line to be seen in
line while dreaming in line after line of fine
useless memorabilia and cultural genocide
If I wasn't the Devil's son, I would warn you,
but since I JUST can't wait for my turn to
flame-cock your holes into a fine pilfered
cinder powder, perhaps I'll just gently tap
you on your backs with my raped-nun
wand dipped in monkey spunk, and old
curry, and say "hallelujah, welcome to The
Grand Adjustment, you won't feel a
thing... You're brains have long rusted".
Oh lemming, oh lemming, look at you jump
I bet you never thought in life you could get
to be so plump -- Oh lemming, oh lemming
enjoy your selfish trance we will soon see
how well you do my underwater dance.
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 5.8
Weighted score: 5.4
Overall Rank: 3184
Posted: August 12, 2004 2:04 PM PDT; Last modified: August 12, 2004 2:04 PM PDT
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Comments:
283 view(s)
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Some sap called Rogers was paying me twice my actual rate to track down his ex-wife, name of Blimpo Toots. Rogers said she'd accidentally grown a beard one morning, checked the mailbox at the wrong time, and then just vanished into the seedy world of backstreet tuba shows. Not as uncommon as you might think, especially not for a girl like Toots, who according to Rogers could blow a Negro through a thirty-foot chimney and still have enough breath to ask for seconds.
I took her photo out of the file and scraped off some of the crust. Yeah, she was a nice-looking broad, but nothing special. I tried to imagine her with a thick black beard bulging out of her cheeks. Well, ho-ly shit. If the Puff-up in my chaps meant anything, Toots'd be halfway to Humpsville by now, riding the cackrails on a rickety asswagon named 'Uncle Sam' with no brakes and a four liter negro injection.