A fish, or what's left of one

Member since 2002 · Posted 10 Aug 2004 · 3 comments

Breathless and kicking Feeling a sudden nostalgia For a life Left behind to float away With the breeze. Patiently waiting For death to rush up From behind like it has done So many times before And repeat Repeat that same pattern. One steady hand Sawing And cutting And closing eyes To bring you back to that same Shoreline where you were planted and grown by indestructible Fate. And now you realize as you drop deeper that there are always more And you believe now that the smart ones always swim away. Always.

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mean 6.11 weighted 5.56 rank 2458 views 218 View voting details →

9 votes so far. Yours would make 10.9 votes so far

3 comments

[7] eyrbare 10-Aug-04/9:57 PM Reply

Nice, I've been playing around with a poem that has a similar theme to this. =-)

[7] richa 12-Aug-04/5:58 AM Reply

Seems to read ok. The ending is a bit abrupt though. Some of the language is a bit unsubtle (indestructable fate).

[8] ForgottenSoul17 12-Aug-04/3:51 PM Reply

i like it i give ita 8 :)