poemranker ::Veracious Flames by Evening

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Free verse № 106934

Veracious Flames

by Evening

Member since 2003 · Posted 30 Jun 2004 · 2 comments

The shadows can be anything I want, but truth remains The flames a hot breath, but they burn just the same and the fragments of bliss which were shared could be the whole But the memories will not recede, though now the evidence fades away And inevitably, unsaid and undone haunt again Though the opportunity is forever lost I decide to carry the heavy urn and spread the ashes among the young, growing trees

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mean 5.33 weighted 5.09 rank 6228 views 154 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

2 comments

[7] Dovina 1-Jul-04/8:49 PM Reply
It's hard to comment on something so vague, but:

Shadows can be anything I want
Flames a hot breath
Fragments of bliss
Memories remain though
Evidence fade
The undone haunts again
Opportunity lost
I carry the heavy urn
Spread ashes among the young,
Growing trees
[9] Shuushin 2-Jul-04/5:23 AM Reply
you could almost remove the first word of every line and the thing would be better for it.

I like this one.