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Freedom (Villanelle) by amanda_dcosta

I love to be free again Arise with the vibrant dawn Away with these heavy chains Into the tempestuous sky Escaping where wild geese fly I love to be free again. My wings cannot be clipped Nor my spirit held tight in grip, Away with these heavy chains Unlock the door of my cell Hear the resounding toll of the bell I love to be free again. Breathe in the sweet, fresh air No more suffocation or stale despair. Away with these heavy chains To roam without a care Build nest or soar away. I love to be free again Away with these heavy chains.

nypoet22 12-Feb-11/11:27 PM
i like a lot of this, but there are a few blips that i think don't work. "held tight in grip" is clunky, you can word it a bit better. "despair" sounds cliche. disrepair? roadside flare? dining room chair? almost anything would be better there than despair. a good effort though, at a difficult form.




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