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Brogues are best (Free verse) by Stephen Robins

The attire for feet of aspiring rogues, The inimitable comfort of Church's brogues, Perfectly designed for pleasurable walking, What else would you choose to stalk in? Best worn with tweed and never morning dress, Take them off last when you undress, Brown at the weekend, black in the club, A verucca brogue to be worn, alone, in the tub. Treat your brogues as you would a young lady, Use a shoe horne and slide in them gently, Pay particular care to the state of the heel, Lest you come undone in Church when you kneel. No loafers for me, nay, nor your boots, For only a true gentleman knows when one shoots, One will appear as a parvenu, Unless one has a pattern 'pon the front of one's shoe.

Fraser Allonby Q.C. 4-Oct-04/6:29 AM
You may think that you are "en vogue"
On account of sporting a brand new brogue;
But the gentleman cares not for fashion.
In fact, he hates it with a passion;
For he knows 'tis just for gays
Who skip around the town for days
Whilst wearing brogues and pink carnations
And suffering from rectal complications.
The gentleman likes to wear a "Welly"
Whether in Singapore or fair New Delhi.
There's nothing that him more perplexes
Than the fashion for brogues 'mongst hemasexes.




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