Could I be your man, could you forgive my history and accept my future? Many mistakes have I and many I will make, but would they overwhelm or be subdued by your sincerity? Missing my voice and missing my courage losing you in the arrogance of my ways finally finding light in my mind and in my heart. A tracking device you implanted secretly and so undetected until now the sound of your voice, your words written on screen, its activation. Ignorant and fearing and sort of consistency running from what is known and of course the unknown like death is desiring escape to somewhere else, somewhere as shallow. Much like my hibernation and awakening, a yearly event, without escape for I do not seek it until now. must history be made before I study it? Is it not possible to control destiny, to determine the paths taken and to be independent of some control? I ask myself now, never before, always after. Fearing the future, forgetting the past and avoiding the present.