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Shame (Other) by blkarakagain
I've seen angels cowering in the streets, in the gutters, on the corners, lonely and scared, stripped of their ecstatic vision and the intimate union with God, wearing scorn and silent reproach like scars on the body, the soul, the human race; I've heard the anguished wails of the forgotten, riding on the wind, screaming, confessing anything, insisting on nothing but recognition, praying to any god who'll listen to collect their tears and tell their stories of being casually despised by those with well placed smiles, well dressed, and well coiffed; I've felt my way through dark and dreadful places full of deadly objects, ghastly and horrid, breathing carefully, lest I inhale the rot of shit, piss, and corruption; screaming, desperately, to clear away any lingering doubt and drive away the terrible darkness; I've seen rivers of sorrow sweeping away optomism which nothing should be able to unconvince, eating away, eating everything and then turning greedily, hungrily, for more, more, more, gorging on children's sighs, until nothing but lonliness resides; I've heard mad, lunatic laughter echoing through the alleys, touching everything, everyone, noone, arousing bloodlust and a sudden interest in the grusome details of death, burning strange images on the conscience, lulling any who hear, toward the cleansing fame of insanity and release; I feel nothing because I have nothing left, nothing but shame, nothing but a lingering emptiness, where once there was naive joy; I have nothing, I want nothing,...but salt for my wounds, or ground glass, or a place to hide while I scream and forget all the terrible consequences of truth and understanding,...I'm so ashamed, shame on me, shame on you; Don't mistake my brooding diatribe for anything other than unmistakable contempt; I am not happy, nor do I wish to be as long as we all abide this awesome ugliness which greets the most innocent, ....there's nothing quite so embarassing as indifference in the midst of squallor, or unforgiving, I am aware, we are all aware, and yet we tolerate this wretched despair in silence,....shame on us all, shame on me.... most of all.

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xxx68.166.37.1850June 21, 2005 3:58 PM PDT
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