Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

Fishing Trip (Free verse) by darkshark
Two yards in a fishing boat, Is quite enough to hold two men, With rods and reels and tackleboxes, And a little room to spare. But three men make it uneasy, With teetering, uneven motion With every movement we make. Fewer fish for every time We break the surface Because someone was uncomfortable Feeling their knee Bump into someone else's. I sigh and shake my head. These are the times A man could begin to desire A deserted island and the chance To fish alone.

Up the ladder: Forever by my side

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
.. 20
.. 11
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 6.8
Weighted score: 5.2145653
Overall Rank: 4399
Posted: March 24, 2004 7:32 PM PST; Last modified: March 24, 2004 7:32 PM PST
View voting details
Comments:
[8] richa @ 81.178.214.98 | 25-Mar-04/5:17 AM | Reply
Neatly done
[9] Shuushin @ 207.5.211.177 | 25-Mar-04/6:52 AM | Reply
the tiny words that don't add value don't hurt this one as much because its a nice sentiment.

You could beef it up by trimming it down though - still - quite well done.
167 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001