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new amsterdam (Free verse) by ThePariahDog
falling from the sky i scraped my knees on the concrete my fingernails were darkened by metropolitan deceit the gale of inner city enterprise fuels its illuminated advertisement enticing consumerism and welcoming the queues that form redundant phrases coupling a delayed expedition denote that the starlet has left the building after our mental attrition meanwhile, coal smeared spartans engage in combat within the arena's frigid environs blackened by the engines of industry their lives are encumbered by tragedy nearby, oppressed vegetation sprouts in cultured venues witness the triumph of nature as a tertiary attraction despite the pain of this vision we produce a certain rheumatism that numbs our perception, tantalizing the id like pin-pricks our carnal revelry is guided by mohammad's edicts

Up the ladder: Coward has a tail
Down the ladder: Balance

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.2689414
Overall Rank: 3909
Posted: March 17, 2004 10:30 AM PST; Last modified: March 17, 2004 10:30 AM PST
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Comments:
[1] fuzzylogicisatwat @ 195.92.198.71 | 18-Mar-04/1:11 PM | Reply
I think you got a bit carried away with being a cock.
[n/a] deleted user @ 198.26.119.85 | 13-Apr-04/8:10 AM | Reply
I absolutely love this poem. I applaud the synical tone of its anti-consumeristic message, although it does sound a bit like a Earth Liberation Front homepage message. Nevertheless, kudos.
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