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autumn angst (Free verse) by skaskowski the universe howls
from holes in the sidewalk,
the death-season is upon us.
that rain is all
you see tonight,
death from above from the trees.
the clouds cover up
the light at dusk
smothering pillows of water.
we're all just paper
to blow in the wind,
ignorant scraps of indifference.
Up the ladder:
Constant Penetration
Down the ladder:
The Mountain
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 2.75
Posted: October 9, 2003 1:51 PM PDT; Last modified: October 9, 2003 1:51 PM PDTWeighted score: 4.7317934 Overall Rank: 11768 Comments:
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I think Kansas said it best with, "we are merely indifferent scraps of ignorance, all we are is indifferent scraps of ignorance ..."
Consider a ";" after "wind" ("therefore" usage, actually, all of your commas here could be semi's) - keep or toss (as usual).