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Piano Guitar Passion (Free verse) by Don-Quixote
Nighttime surrounds the glowing ember of the moon and I watch the luminescent ember while my hands roam the grass searching a million fingers for tiny creatures. A tear rolls along the highway of my face, my eyes maddened, staring with rage. Memories spill over my vision, like an lsd adventure gone wrong. My ears start to play a song of melancholy, breath and heart playing the drums, providing beat. I can feel the heat of hate, knowing revenge comes when I least suspect it. Sugar love can't cool this fire. I stand balancing upon piano wire, strumming my love and hate into the dark air, peace nonexistent. Lips whisper to the moon: "I know why you come only at night, to light my dark roads.."

Up the ladder: Back to Sorrow
Down the ladder: READY TO KNOW WHATS GOIN ON

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Arithmetic Mean: 3.75
Weighted score: 4.8509965
Overall Rank: 10532
Posted: August 25, 2003 1:35 AM PDT; Last modified: August 25, 2003 1:35 AM PDT
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Comments:
[7] richa @ 81.86.243.81 | 25-Aug-03/3:37 AM | Reply
ember twice is a mistake. And does the moon really glow like an ember?

Seems to be a lot going on here, searching the grass/ the revenge/ the piano.

Lots of nice phrases, not sure how it all fits together though
[n/a] Don-Quixote @ 69.19.181.142 > richa | 25-Aug-03/12:55 PM | Reply
ah, thanks for pointing out the use of ember twice, and yeah, it does glow like an ember.. atleast to me.. im wierd. heh.
[n/a] Rilke4ClosetLesbians @ 67.121.76.250 | 25-Aug-03/10:24 AM | Reply
Aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!! Bad metaphors, AUGH!!!!!!!
[n/a] Don-Quixote @ 69.19.181.142 > Rilke4ClosetLesbians | 25-Aug-03/12:54 PM | Reply
bad metaphors? ... what metaphors?.. hrmm? rilke, dont speak when you dont know exactly what yer yappin bout.
[0] Crakyamuni @ 12.83.71.165 | 28-Aug-03/3:50 PM | Reply
Drug induced mind banter with the unknowable isn't poetry, it's more like, mmmm.., 8th grade! Are you in the gifted classes? Sugar love, ..hmmm.?heh?
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