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The Final Say (Concrete) by Nightmare-Poet
Rip open my chest and tear out my heart You cannot do worse than my life so far Take out my veins and throw them around Tie them in knots askew on the ground If you saw my world so dark and so dead You'd feel better off with a hole in your head My depression's so strong I cannot let go My feelings so dead, no thought have been left I'm hopeless to you I'm not helping myself I can't do a thing and I'm gaining no wealth I tried to be good I tried to put in I tried so damn hard but never could win I'm sorry it ends it ends like this I'm crying right now sweet dead in my bliss I can't take the pressure of the simple things So what about life? Does anyone win? I thought about sooner but gave it a chance But since I've moved on I'm not even a glance Digging this hole deep in the ground My life's gone in circles, round and around I've gone cold, so empty inside I'm not afraid now I've nothing to hide I welcome in arms wide open and spread To the soft white pillow to soon rest my head To my friends far and wide and my family so close To all of these people who I'll miss the most Don't be so sad the world will go on I'll look down upon you from up and beyond I think it's now, my time is right When you're all asleep during the night My final few words have not much to say Except to this world "Goodbye and good day"

Up the ladder: Is it just a word
Down the ladder: A good book

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
.. 11
.. 10
.. 10
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 30

Arithmetic Mean: 4.75
Weighted score: 4.9327645
Overall Rank: 9139
Posted: August 7, 2003 12:57 PM PDT; Last modified: August 7, 2003 12:57 PM PDT
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Comments:
[n/a] DreamerSupreme @ 204.31.169.3 | 7-Aug-03/1:13 PM | Reply
A Pimple Infested Suicide Note
The Modern Day Teenage Emote
Jump Off The Boat
Into The Sea
SWIM WILLY, SWIM WILLY BE FREE!
Get That Underwater Submarine Degree
Go On That Crusade
God Knows You Paid
Tons Of Shrimp Just To Fade
Into The Deep Blue Abyss
Oh Jesu How I Will Miss
That Neurotic Navy Submarine Torpedo Man
He Was Rocketed Into A H20 Space Adventure
2001 Leagues Under The Sea, A Loser Odyssey
[n/a] New Life Drug @ 67.112.120.11 | 7-Aug-03/10:01 PM | Reply
I would replace the word "depression" with something else like.. agony.. it made it sound so cliche and prescribed.. I hate hearing poems like this.. it reminds me of my old ones.. I got a really nice image thought with the veins in knots.hahah
[5] scitz @ 62.105.119.105 | 8-Aug-03/6:26 AM | Reply
This would make a great pimple thats why your not bagging the 10s. An impudent entree in to that category would be advised .

Heres a 5 and i'll 10 it if its a pimple.
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