Wake me up before you go

Wha... Who..... huh....? ok! OK! I'm coming.... Geez it's bright out here! What is it? What do you want? Ha ha ....ok,enough. that kind of tickles. Hey! Stop! I said..... You're making me angry now..... Ok, THAT'S IT! You want to see my beak eh?... HOW'S THIS?!! Close enough for ya? Don't like it do you? Didn't think SO! Oh no, come back here you... You wanted to see me, well here I am!!!!! How about a nice hug?!! While I turn this handle back here. See, you push too far and this is what happens. All in the name of education. I'm gonna give YOU an education! How about I feel YOU up? What's down here? AWWWW. Am I making you uncomfortable? GOOD! Spread 'em!! See? It's not fun anymore. Is it. Ever had a fog job? Cool, huh? Awww. Where ya goin'? I was just starting to have fun!!! What a boring date you are. Stupid humans. Ought to know better than to mess with something that has more appendages than they do. GO! Get outta here. You flimsy flippered freak! Don't come back either! CHUM!! Next time I'll have my friends Murray and Hammer with me. They'll make you feel reel good. Trust me. Come here you little.....*CRACK* UGH! ptew! ptoo! pleh...blech... Christ! What do I have to do to get some good crab and a nap around here?!!