December 15, 1995 ~ Time T R A V A I L ~ T raumatized with intensive intrusions T reatise continuing, subject matter the same T rappings of my mind, filled with confusion T error filled days never change Talisman, why have you not come here? T wist of fate perhaps T wilight of previous days, so filled with fear ~~ R elegated to become an outcast R elinquished of dreaming R ain-check on my life that passed Rationalize? Uncommon thoughts I schemed R emembrances of where I once stood R eminiscing of garland that once decorated my life R hapsodizing now. I'm told this is good ~~~ A bstract words that cut like a knife A llocated to refrain from speaking Alone and scared, wanting to flee A rguably the problem is my bereaving Against my will. Can't you see? A ppearances of myself and noticeable fear A ppraising my situation . . .it all seems so dark ~~~~ V ain and stupid, I did not care V arious shortcomings were my mark V aporized dreams and sometimes footloose V ery identical of a previous time V iable situations. Can you take off my noose? V icious circles to my retreat of rhyme V erve now spent, just like the shunt ~~~~~ A iling and hurt, to a corner I had moved A zure eyes and body of runt A rdent pleasures, now once removed A rousing my thoughts of love A rid and barren, soiled, I stood in my garden A waiting a day from above A nchored to stone, only to harden ~~~~~~ I will T R A V A I L I mpassive as I may seem I ndicative as it may be, my feelings are real I ris of my eyes, color my dreams I ntroduce me again to the love of life I nstill my hope, covet my soul I nvite me back so I may exit this strife ~~~~~~~ L ove again fills my wish to make me whole L aughter and choice can again be mine L ariat removed from my head L atent resemblance, due in time L ullabies gone of being dead L over of life, hope and promise L eavening of my risen spirit that will rise again _______ Tlb