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Damien (Free verse) by Sugarbbybuttrfly
It seems as though your always on my mind thinking about the way you move Losing track of time Try to keep it cool when your around And I can do it all Except maybe frown Theres a twinkle in your eye A gleam in your smile That makes every moment spent with you Seem so worth while But its hard to tell What you feel inside I try to look for answers But they always seem to hide Maybe once or twice A glimmer will appear But I always seem to be the one Left with a tear My friends don't know what to say I don't know what to do Are you simply waiting For me to make a move If that is the case You need to give me a sign Something that tells me That you'll be all mine I'm so confused and so scared That I may not be right That these actions arent exactly Giving me the green light Damien my friend You must let me know Exactly how far this friendship is gonna go Do I really stand a chance To have you you in my world Or will I just have to sit and dream About being your girl

Up the ladder: Too late?

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 2.6666667
Weighted score: 4.72186
Overall Rank: 11870
Posted: December 15, 2002 9:21 PM PST; Last modified: December 15, 2002 9:21 PM PST
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Comments:
[n/a] Caducus @ 62.105.88.10 | 16-Dec-02/5:01 AM | Reply
Not adult enough for me in its depiction of infatuation, you need to show more dimension to your work as this stands it makes the character look pitiful, and desperate.
You write the way you want too though I'm a miserable shit. (not voted)
[6] Shuushin @ 207.5.211.177 | 5-Feb-04/8:59 PM | Reply
you are = you're
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