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A Moment in Time (Free verse) by nentwined
With these lines I do entwine you, your mind, a moment in time with subtle fragrance of memory, with the lover's kiss of rain, with the seeds of futures yet to come blowing in the wind. Strong arms softly clench you tight and whisper one more wish "good night". Fingers gently stroke your cheek, guiding consciousness to sleep. Ev'ry shooting star is a hundred wishes made; every single moment is a wetly glist'ning blade of grass swaying in the wind, with the seeds of futures yet to come, the lover's kiss of rain, with these lines I do entwine -- you, your mind, and a moment in time.

Up the ladder: Chickens
Down the ladder: you're never alone

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 136
.. 12
.. 16
.. 02
.. 11
.. 01
.. 03
.. 00
.. 11
.. 00
.. 16

Arithmetic Mean: 6.9565215
Weighted score: 6.9565096
Overall Rank: 149
Posted: March 16, 2002 1:19 AM PST; Last modified: March 16, 2002 1:19 AM PST
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Comments:
[0]... anonymous @ | 7-Jul-01/1:24 AM | Reply
K -- guess I just don't like love poems that much -- but this is not bad. Like the repeat of the first stanza at the end -- pulls it together. Better. MarkB
[0]... anonymous @ | 7-Aug-01/7:25 AM | Reply
some nice sentiments and rhythms - but the images seem tired and lack rootedness (truth)
[8] ifni @ | 16-Mar-02/1:21 AM | Reply
Spectacular.
[0]... anonymous @ | 9-Sep-01/6:46 PM | Reply
like the sweetest of lullabyes...
[0]... anonymous @ | 4-May-02/12:27 PM | Reply
So romantic...
[9] LilMsLadyPoet @ 152.163.100.135 | 11-Jul-05/9:23 AM | Reply
Some might say it's alittle on the gushy side...but I like it! Kinda hypnotic...and that fits the piece...plus...a kindred spirit I find, writing those words. Dominant minds...hmm...responsibility comes with it. Lover's kiss of rain...beautifully erotic and rather sensual piece in an intellectual way....yes...I like it. 9 again.
[0] conny lingers @ 0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1 | 2-Feb-21/9:14 AM | Reply
pompous twaddle
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