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a genius (Free verse) by moonUnit I can see it now
at a fragile age
your first love
second love
whatever love that you should want
because you
will not be denied,
have never been denied.
I used to rest my head
between your shoulderblades
and listen to you
talking
we all knew you were so brilliant.
you are more than
I will ever have the chance to be
but I don't mourn for that
anymore.
I used to break down
at the very mention of your name
and shake, and cry
it's been three years and still
i love you.
Up the ladder:
The Cad
Down the ladder:
My Son
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 4.928571
Posted: October 15, 2002 7:45 PM PDT; Last modified: October 15, 2002 7:45 PM PDTWeighted score: 4.9477816 Overall Rank: 8996 Comments:
[7]
Christof @ 195.172.133.226
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16-Oct-02/2:29 AM
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Reply
This is very direct, though I don't really understand the first/second love part - is that you? Or someone else? Anyway, you should forget this person and move on, you'll be happier.
The ending is so damn boring...
oh dear
the end makes me think of a cut-out picture shrine with incense and candles.
I thought this was going to be good but it fell apart line by line until it pooped out in horrific fashion at the end.
I can hear the beams failing at L13. Creeeeeeeak, splat!
Are you the child of Mr. Zappa? This is a nicely melancholic, elegiac poem, and it uses the word shoulderblades. Excellent.
i love you too. 10.
sweet
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