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I've thought a lot (Free verse) by MacFrantic
I've thought a lot about what I've written and I've come to realize much, most of it...undesirable. It's not incomprehensible nor childish: those are such that they demand inaccuracies whether of manner or of reason, but undesirable in a way that, upon pulling those suction cup eyes from the page, you should wonder why what says so little should make such length to say it. I have empathy. I too have wisdom enough to see what I produce is naught but granite to hungry men. Ask now I of you: what is so desired in ourselves that we should be seeking desired things? Would it not be beneficial to seek the undesired? It is in this we see the great reality. Our temptation is to walk into the light, where the world is bright and endearing. But into the shadows we must go, for what we want we cannot see.

Up the ladder: Forgiveness
Down the ladder: We - Who Work

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Arithmetic Mean: 6.25
Weighted score: 5.1490035
Overall Rank: 5275
Posted: October 4, 2006 1:02 AM PDT; Last modified: October 4, 2006 1:02 AM PDT
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Comments:
[10] Dovina @ 12.72.43.226 | 4-Oct-06/9:39 AM | Reply
Yes, I'm hearing you! And seeing through a little more shadow toward what I cannot see. To aim at communication in poetry is to aim too low. To think we know what to aim for is the silliness of a child as seen by an adult.

Oh, they will tell you you are telling, not showing. Let them rant. This is good!
[4] nentwined @ 68.232.253.122 | 4-Oct-06/6:13 PM | Reply
odd. interesting. oddly convoluted in manner, which doesn't seem to suit the piece (except by way of example, but generally it's best not to give so strong an example of self-reference with something negative).
[10] leonxic @ 129.7.120.229 | 12-Oct-06/1:36 PM | Reply
Now I can die enlightened.
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