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Something More (Free verse) by drnick Perhaps we'd be better
naked and alone
finding comfort inside
our beds at home.
Shy shines deep in
innocent stares.
Little of life
is found insecurities.
Failure can consume
all hope and dreams.
A chance is all
you need to loose.
Seeing your smiles on
the back of my eyelids.
Wake me up again
with starry night eyes.
You can only slow
a force of nature.
Like an avalanche
arrive in the chaos.
Perhaps we'd be better
naked and alone
finding comfort inside
some bed at home.
Up the ladder:
Deconstruction Of The Heart
Down the ladder:
Last dance at the lake
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 7.2
Posted: August 11, 2006 1:59 AM PDT; Last modified: August 11, 2006 1:59 AM PDTWeighted score: 5.2622466 Overall Rank: 3981 Comments:
fuck, it should say "you need to lose.", not "you need to loose."
I had a feeling you meant that. You've definitely made this format your own recently :-)
Damn you got rythm my brotha.
An inordinate amount of people spell lose loose and i don't know why...however, not bad.
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You can only slow
a force of nature.
Like an avalanche
arrive in the chaos.
broke away from that soothing tone somewhat and whilst I see their necessity I cant precislely put my finger on it, but there is something that stops me giving this a 10 within those lines.