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Stranger (Free verse) by MacFrantic
Every midnight, on the hour Clarence Michael takes his shower, Lies between his cotton sheets, Plays his cards and cries and eats. Every morning in his bed He make believes his fish are dead. Clarence sends them down to rest He flushes twice, he then gets dressed. He wears a suit two sizes small He paints the rest; he paints it all. His skin is grey, it makes him think If now his mind is on the brink. He walks to work eleven miles As he arrives, he greets and smiles. All his peers just shake their skulls And flock to home like hurried gulls. Clarence stays 'til half past ten. He catches the bus back home again. He eats his breakfast, says it's early, Cuts his hair to make it curly. All the while he can't decide Where tonight he's going to hide When all the men in suits do come And make him just like everyone.

Up the ladder: Painted Air
Down the ladder: Gifts

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 00
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.. 30
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Arithmetic Mean: 6.3333335
Weighted score: 5.3585887
Overall Rank: 3309
Posted: September 1, 2005 6:24 PM PDT; Last modified: September 1, 2005 6:24 PM PDT
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Comments:
[8] T. Jonathron Remp @ 128.252.229.185 | 2-Sep-05/7:35 AM | Reply
Third stanza is a bit shaky. Otherwise good. *8*
[7] LilMsLadyPoet @ 152.163.100.67 | 2-Sep-05/10:32 AM | Reply
This is listed under 'Free Verse', but isn't it a form? Not that I would know all the technicalities of such things...just wondering. I don't care where you put it. Oh, and...isn't he just like everyone? I think so....
[7] wilco @ 66.61.101.130 | 2-Sep-05/11:38 AM | Reply
Nice...like a demented Dr. Seuss.
[8] ay deee @ 24.255.87.123 | 3-Sep-05/10:33 PM | Reply
when does he find time to get new fish?

i gave an eight just because that last part didn't flow to me
[7] Heather Dee @ 63.17.24.26 | 6-Sep-05/2:51 AM | Reply
What is this about is the guy getting fucked?
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