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Weariness (Free verse) by Niphredil weariness,
blanketing the world with a dull shroud;
and flashes of light
piercing the clear night sky,
seem faint and weak
and very, very far away.
Up the ladder:
your garden
Down the ladder:
i died for love
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 3.75
Posted: July 30, 2005 3:26 AM PDT; Last modified: July 30, 2005 3:26 AM PDTWeighted score: 4.8509965 Overall Rank: 10556 Comments:
[8]
Dovina @ 62.212.120.118
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30-Jul-05/10:20 PM
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Reply
Like sleeping beneath a volcano.
I would change blanketing to blankets, and take out the comma after sky. Actually, I would take out all the punctuation, take out "and' and use "the flashes of light".
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