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If you're done, I'd like my Battle Axe please (Free verse) by D. $ Fontera Dear "My Only Ever True Love in the World and Endearing Soul Mate",
If you're quite done
Cleaving my dignity in two
and dismembering my pride,
I would most appreciate it
If you considered returning my Battle Axe
to me.
I have a castle to defend.
Love,
"Your One and Only Heartbroken Admirer"
P.S. Would it hurt you to sharpen it a bit before you get it back to me?
Up the ladder:
My Swarthy Bane
Down the ladder:
Never Did You
Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
Arithmetic Mean: 4.5
Posted: July 29, 2005 3:34 PM PDT; Last modified: July 29, 2005 3:34 PM PDTWeighted score: 4.9403987 Overall Rank: 9114 Comments:
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If you considered returning" to 'if you'd consider returning'.
and "before you get it back to me" perhaps would change 'get' to 'give', or 'return it to me?'