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If you're done, I'd like my Battle Axe please (Free verse) by D. $ Fontera
Dear "My Only Ever True Love in the World and Endearing Soul Mate", If you're quite done Cleaving my dignity in two and dismembering my pride, I would most appreciate it If you considered returning my Battle Axe to me. I have a castle to defend. Love, "Your One and Only Heartbroken Admirer" P.S. Would it hurt you to sharpen it a bit before you get it back to me?

Up the ladder: yet another what if poem

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Arithmetic Mean: 4.5
Weighted score: 4.9403987
Overall Rank: 9075
Posted: July 29, 2005 3:34 PM PDT; Last modified: July 29, 2005 3:34 PM PDT
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Comments:
[7] LilMsLadyPoet @ 205.188.116.69 | 31-Jul-05/7:13 AM | Reply
I love this...I think I would change "I would most appreciate it
If you considered returning" to 'if you'd consider returning'.
and "before you get it back to me" perhaps would change 'get' to 'give', or 'return it to me?'
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