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When the muse calls. (Free verse) by darby pyn
A gilded flash of inspiration stirs the blood from it’s congealed state and loosens the rivets from my mask to let the light in and bleeding to start. the dialog of my surroundings loose shape. language is no longer noise but music. the catharsis needs resolve. all obstacles dissolve and all inhibition disappear when this apparition appears. I will be selfish. starving for substance. focused to the point of blindness when my eyes are shells and my fingers have sight. this state of devotion is demanded when the muse calls.

Up the ladder: To be alive
Down the ladder: Faces

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Arithmetic Mean: 3.25
Weighted score: 4.7913947
Overall Rank: 11248
Posted: June 15, 2005 8:04 AM PDT; Last modified: June 16, 2005 11:14 PM PDT
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Comments:
[3] Bankrupt_Word_Clerk @ 71.129.180.150 | 16-Jun-05/11:58 AM | Reply
inhibitions instead of inabitions.. because inabitions is not a word. a great word instead of inabitions would be inanitions.

inanitions means exhaustion, as from lack of nourishment or vitality. This would make the next line about starving flow.
[n/a] darby pyn @ 207.200.116.197 > Bankrupt_Word_Clerk | 16-Jun-05/11:08 PM | Reply
Thank you bankrupt. I will fix it and use your suggestion.
[n/a] darby pyn @ 207.200.116.197 > darby pyn | 16-Jun-05/11:17 PM | Reply
I decided on inhibition. it just seemed to flow better
to my ear. I appreciate the spell check.
thanks again.
[4] Dovina @ 69.175.32.185 | 17-Jun-05/10:32 AM | Reply
Not a poem, but some good thoughts that could be made into a poem.
[n/a] darby pyn @ 207.200.116.197 > Dovina | 17-Jun-05/11:02 PM | Reply
Thank you dovina for your insight.
[6] deleted user @ 81.69.23.196 | 17-Jun-05/1:13 PM | Reply
Something went wrong with the layout. Copied from the quoted part of an email?

A pity, as the poem has elegance. I would reconsider the last line. Mainly because of >>demanded<<
[n/a] darby pyn @ 207.200.116.197 > deleted user | 17-Jun-05/11:09 PM | Reply
the original line was " necessary". I have problems with
it also. thank you for your input.
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