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The Resilient Woman (Free verse) by Joe-joe
She strolls slowly between the drops That leave behind a trail of brine And thirst like she had never known before Lays claim where running water did once reside And though blinded by beckoning swells That rise beyond what one less might endure She gently parries each passing squall And watches on from afar as teardrops fall And fresh streams of hope form beneath her feet.

Up the ladder: Wartner

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Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
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Arithmetic Mean: 6.0
Weighted score: 5.119203
Overall Rank: 5791
Posted: April 28, 2005 12:57 PM PDT; Last modified: April 28, 2005 12:58 PM PDT
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Comments:
[7] sliver @ 207.200.116.130 | 28-Apr-05/8:02 PM | Reply
What is a ship? Alex
[10] zodiac @ 212.118.19.76 | 29-Apr-05/4:28 AM | Reply
Not bad, but it should be "thirst like she HAS never known before" and broken into several shorter sentences - after "reside", I'd say, and maybe after "brine".
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