poemranker ::Veins by helenwales

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Free verse № 118233

Veins

by helenwales

Member since 2004 · Posted 11 Jan 2005 · 7 comments

Here in this nest I lie with my eyes barely closed against the thud of your heartbeat, The gentle rush of the blood in my veins pulses in time with this metronome, There was never a time when I didn’t exist, The latent kinetic energy of your destiny always knew my name, Faith in god, in breathing while you're asleep, I existed before you, my root carving a furrow in your future, The deepest vein of all.

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mean 5.25 weighted 5.03 rank 7298 views 175 View voting details →

4 votes so far. Yours would make 5.4 votes so far

7 comments

[5] jauser 11-Jan-05/7:24 PM Reply
waaa? I don't get i.
[6] Shuushin 11-Jan-05/9:19 PM Reply
"thud" implies a kind of finality - at least to me, as in it was the last heartbeat. I know, you say "metronome" later - too late.

"Faith in god, in breathing while you're asleep" does this mean god is allowing his lungs (diaphram) to contract and expand? And if this were the case, I would think such a generous entity would deserve a big "G" at least.

Can't quite get a grip on this one's meaning - could be the several metaphors - nest/nature, metronome/music, goe/religion, root/no idea. vein/medicine.

A riddle of some kind? Thinking... is this the famous egg of the Jesus Omelette??!
[n/a] zodiac › Shuushin 11-Jan-05/10:20 PM Reply
'"thud" implies a kind of finality' is my favorite thing on poemranker today.
[6] Shuushin › zodiac 11-Jan-05/10:55 PM Reply
And the day is still young...
[n/a] zodiac › Shuushin 13-Jan-05/5:32 AM Reply
Thud.
[n/a] helenwales 11-Jan-05/9:36 PM Reply
It was about a baby. Not a nice presence though. Perhaps an unwanted child. Sometimes babies can feel like a growth with an inevitable, unstoppable birth and impact on your life. (No I don't have children and yes I intend too ;-).
[10] piedle 11-Oct-06/4:29 AM Reply
it has the cheek of early Yeats, the wind resistance of byron, and eminems special sauce.

I give it four out of four air pies.