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Locomotive's Graveyard (Free verse) by longships
Great rusting hulks lie scattered among hedgerows, Overgrowing weeds spill from once smoking funnels. Pistons compress no more. Once polished brass has tarnished over the lonely years, Cast iron shells, Giants of their age, Display no sign of life. Reminiscing I gaze at lines of once gleaming wheels. Coal holds stare black into the face of oblivion, Leaving their past in the memories of those who once cared.

Up the ladder: Anvil man
Down the ladder: Battle of the sexes

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Arithmetic Mean: 7.285714
Weighted score: 5.614723
Overall Rank: 2250
Posted: October 11, 2004 12:35 PM PDT; Last modified: October 11, 2004 12:35 PM PDT
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Comments:
[8] Caducus @ 81.130.200.189 | 12-Oct-04/2:36 AM | Reply
You've given these dead loco's the kiss of life here and mucho respect for not dragging on too long with it. Lines 6/7 are can be explored further i feel, the greatness of of something now rusting away as fields bloom before them.
[8] Dovina @ 24.52.156.155 | 12-Oct-04/4:36 PM | Reply
I like this description and the "memories of those who once cared." Comma after reminiscing. Do pistons ever compress? Are coal holds really tinder cars? If so how do they stare?
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