Help | About | Suggestions | Alms | Chat [0] | Users [0] | Log In | Join
 Search:
Poem: Submit | Random | Best | Worst | Recent | Comments   

Devil's Palm (Free verse) by Brandy_n_Cali
I sit in the Devil's hand. Just one drink, it never depends. With one sip, no problems, no worries, no cares, It feels intense, one more drink. Discouraged and scared I walk away, forgetting the past and all the pain. As I finish the bottle, my life shatters against the wall. He the one they call "The Devil" has challenged us all. What was important, no longer is. What was mine is now his. I made all the wrong choices before. Now I will never get the chance to walk through those white doors.

Up the ladder: Buried
Down the ladder: Creation

You must be logged in to leave comments. Vote:

Votes: (green: user, blue: anonymous)
 GraphVotes
10  .. 10
.. 00
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10
.. 10
.. 00
.. 00
.. 00
.. 10

Arithmetic Mean: 5.4
Weighted score: 5.0476813
Overall Rank: 6903
Posted: August 29, 2004 2:33 PM PDT; Last modified: August 29, 2004 2:33 PM PDT
View voting details
Comments:
[n/a] Brandy_n_Cali @ 4.182.248.127 | 30-Aug-04/3:30 PM | Reply
somone comment please
[5] Dovina @ 24.52.157.176 > Brandy_n_Cali | 30-Aug-04/3:48 PM | Reply
As you finish the bottle, drunk, you see the devil, and what was yours is now his. You decide you have made all the wrong choices and will be denied heaven. It's a workable theme, but I don't see it developed, no reasons given.
[4] nentwined @ 66.92.183.34 > Dovina | 7-Sep-04/8:28 PM | Reply
ditto, ish, though workable is debatable.
[8] sliver @ 63.190.80.173 | 4-Sep-04/8:19 AM | Reply
I think you should sleep on this and hit it again, it begs for more.
165 view(s)




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001