poemranker ::Restless rest. by Furin

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 108997

Restless rest.

by Furin

Member since 2004 · Posted 24 Jul 2004 · 1 comment

Who is restless as the river? Sun sets man sleeps. That's all it gets until it leaps. Tree bends child dreams. It never ends is as it seems. Water seeps tides go out. Some in deeps, what is it all about? Flames hold still lakes evaporate. Connections on this hill are never too late. Pressure drops many die. The river stops it's all a lie.

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 3.00 weighted 4.91 rank 9741 views 180 View voting details →

2 votes so far. Yours would make 3.2 votes so far

1 comment

[n/a] deleted user 24-Jul-04/7:55 PM Reply
the punctuation of this needs a LOT of work, since the sentences, though poetic, are barely represented.
try a comma or two, and check your ending punctuation, there are some places where you need question marks, but lack them.
the poem isn't strong enough to drown out the grammatical errors, so my voting would be pointless.
this needs honing. badly.