poemranker ::Insurance Frauds by skaskowski

DetailsThe poem, its numbers, and the conversation.

Free verse № 106309

Insurance Frauds

Member since 2001 · Posted 23 Jun 2004 · Edited 23 Jun 2004 · 8 comments

All my insurance on chesspieces lets greasy Lead feces stain with their weight and their filthiness. As though it's an act of God to be shit upon. At any moment the climb turns. And you're falling down but still aware of the handles you're passing up. It's a strange paradigm shift, to be lifted up by a subtle inuendo, Only to crash again When her brash defense cripples every sense of self-sustanance. But I'm wealthy in my own indiscriminate choices in females to fancy. When they dance with me, my feet seem to treat the ground as an already vanquished enemy. So I'm to blame, you see for tolerating all those months of second thoughts, Because when the shelf collapses the knick-knacks break and the fragments are raked into piles of rotting insect corpses. Of course it's so simple! With a second of hindsight the light illuminates the nights of diluted fate. But I'd rather not see them right now. I'd rather live up in the rafters with bats or with the shafts of spotlight that pierce through the night to highlight one lonely form on the stage before the dawn breaks in through open curtains, and it finally is certain that this all is just interpretive dancing through the hurt. So often we shirk any realizations that pain can be dulled by infatuation. Alas, alas, the beams are cracked and give out at their grain at her final refrain. And the stage is collapsed And I fear I'll relapse into helping her back to her feet. That would be a repeat of how I got here.

Rate it

0 is the worst, 10 the best. Pick a number, add a comment if you like, then send it. Keys: 0–9 pick, Enter sends.

mean 5.17 weighted 5.04 rank 7002 views 273 View voting details →

6 votes so far. Yours would make 7.6 votes so far

8 comments

[2] god'swife 23-Jun-04/1:00 PM Reply
meandering. the first stanza is so difficult to understand, it makes the rest pointless. The last couplet is sort of the cherry on the cake of incomprehensiveness. How you got where exactly?
[8] Dovina 23-Jun-04/2:29 PM Reply
Anytime you can take two apparently unrelated things and make one a metaphor for the other, you're into the dancefloor of poetry. Some of your wording is hard to follow, but what you are doing is not. I'll take that anyday over a perfectly formed poem with nothing to say.
[7] zodiac › Dovina 23-Jun-04/3:27 PM Reply
What an extraordinarily silly comment!

I found it even more entertaining than "I find it a great comedy that people who devote so much energy to the accurate phrase, the descriptive word, can mire under word-clouds of misunderstanding."
[8] Dovina › zodiac 23-Jun-04/10:47 PM Reply
Happy to entertain. That's why I go on stage.
[7] zodiac 23-Jun-04/3:58 PM Reply
re "At any moment the climb turns.
And you're falling down
but still aware of the
handles you're passing up."

Are you just using 'you' to be chatty, or are you seriously assuming we're all the same kind of self-absorbed impotents that your narrator is?
[7] zodiac 23-Jun-04/3:58 PM Reply
And you misspelled innuendo.
[n/a] skaskowski › zodiac 24-Jun-04/1:18 AM Reply
i will let this self-absorbed and moderately drunken piece remain unchanged, even if it's lacking on several fronts.
[n/a] sliver › skaskowski 7-Nov-04/2:07 PM Reply
Probably the best probable choice.