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Washing-up Hands and Disgruntled Underarms (Free verse) by fevriere
Scars won't fade fast And in the summertime, the one on her cheek Is bright as paint, is red as lips. Her face refuses to be quiet: she wishes her scar was white as milk gentle; Godly; girly. She wishes she was holding hands. She wishes she was sharing kisses. She wishes she was Audrey Hepburn. Milky. No, darling, the taste in her mouth is spicy and sour And her palms sweat like butter in the heat. No, darling, that girl's a bad bad one, That girl's night inside. She's not quite real yet. She's no white hart. She's no milk-weeping Virgin statue.

Down the ladder: The Deer And The Stick

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Arithmetic Mean: 7.4
Weighted score: 5.286087
Overall Rank: 3747
Posted: May 14, 2004 2:07 AM PDT; Last modified: May 14, 2004 2:09 AM PDT
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Comments:
[9] Shuushin @ 147.154.235.51 | 14-May-04/2:06 PM | Reply
did you mean "hart" is in a male [red] deer?

quite nice, though maybe a few too many "is"s and "was"s
[9] richa @ 81.178.254.233 | 15-May-04/6:02 AM | Reply
very good, nice use of language, I think that is important.

Not sure about 'milky' as a sentence in its own right. Sounds like some mad persons catchphrase.
[n/a] fevriere @ 62.254.128.4 > richa | 5-Jan-05/12:19 PM | Reply
Now you put it that way..
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