god'swife12 Aug 2003

they this is written I get the feeling you are trying to justify the reasons for your actions. The reason is the justification. I see a hint of that insight. The impulse of sex, the satisfying drama of a real good fuck, is one form love takes. Our culture deems it immoral.

I think it's important to wonder at your own brashness, your overtly erotic life. Slash away at the lies about sex and loving, but lines like

...oral possibilities...
...regretful announcement...I mean these same lines are in a poem about sexual objectification, and exploits of the nasty kind. These lines are too shy and nerdy for this poem. Don't be shy, just write it.

"Fellow passengers"???????? Do you speak this way to your friends or at home?

"And then, my fellow passengers broke out in song"

arduous potholes which jolt the bus(this line sounds convoluted)