Mr Pig28 Feb 2003

By Jove what a surreal piece of lit. You do really need to be more precise with what you are trying to convey here. This could be a rich purse of sovereigns but you've not tied it. I do like the line 'when I awake I am bleeding' its quite affecting but one needs to improve the context and enlighten the reader more as to what the bloody point is. I will give you a 5 for effort but take your time when writing poems, lock on to the emotions that make sense or else no soul will know what your talking about.
I wish you well.

God Speed !