I was blushing and the universe exploded into photograms and mania, into technically the-sky-ran-fast, always faster I couldn't chase it down, it was then I overlooked my ability to hear things the volume of rain, scalding of water, but summer came fast when it didn't have a sound and dark vast winds were tempting me to do things, someone dissembled my brain I thought, like learning to love sex in those days water and forgiveness became one empty motion, and when the panic came it slid off me like rain.