poemranker ::Replying

ReplyTo a comment on without music by Limness.

god'swife13 Nov 2002

The second stanza. Try to replace all those "alone"s. with god only knows what. I lose your voice there. You're such a clever girl, am sure you can come up with something. Or even 'alone, alone, alone/I. He. We.' I don't know, just the tone is so educated and then that central part seems less than.