Replying to a comment on:

Poem #5 (of a series of poems for Boo) (Free verse) by Owner of the Sky

Everyday, I walk as if in water; And my words are trapped in bubbles, Floating upwards, forever without end, But always failing to reach you. I want to grab your smile, Filter it through the dying leaves, Through the first promise Of death in autum, To marry it to the earth So that the whole world can know you, Can know what it feels To be touched by you.

god'swife 2-Oct-02/8:11 AM
I feel good after reading this. Quiet and sweet. The image "death in autumn" is slightly off. Autumn is an active part of the cycle, winter is death. I see the relationship between the leaves falling, but the tree has not gone dormant, everythings waking up after summer. Maybe I'm too particular. Lets see waht others think. All in all a lovely poem.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001