Replying to a comment on:

Always (Free verse) by hobojo

Like eternal sundowns There you set Like distant rain You spill down Like the oceans wave There you are Just beyond my grasp Lingering in the distance A constant reminder Of pleasant memories Sadness remains in knowing You can only be my past And in knowing that these memories Will forever last

hobojo 19-Dec-08/2:14 PM
Your version is much better, yes. Changes the meaning a bit though. I know I am a terrible writer, but it is one of the many things I am trying to get better at. Thanks for taking the time to write your thoughts, I always enjoy reading your poems.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001