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Alfredo (Free verse) by Caducus

Shadows brought heels to a calomine ghost wailing on linoleum for a stranger to leave. Heels brought soft voices and hands that held needles, the stranger wept quietly whispering ‘Papa’. Sleep brought a dream to the calomine ghost he was nineteen and golden making love in a vineyard whispering ‘Francesca’. Dreams left a stranger smiling on linoleum. He heard his Papa as he slept uttering ‘Francesca’, and the stranger left as his son: ‘Alfredo’

richa 21-Aug-07/3:31 PM
I agree this need more detail for the reader to make out who the characters are to eachother. I like the idea of the shadows being a heel to the ghost. The transition from shadows brought heels to heels brought soft voices is also rather elegant.




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