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Summer Festival (Free verse) by Christof

During a day and a half of wind and rain There's no point bringing the washing in And the loose-limbed shirts and trouser legs The clinging bras and flapping skirts Slick with water like sweaty skin Dance a blissful drunken shrug And will not stop till the sun floods in.

lmp 29-Jun-07/3:23 PM
i would start line 2 differently; it is disjointed and does not flow well from line 1. perhaps "we saw" instead of "there's" on line 2 or maybe omit "during" from line 1.

no need for the "and" at the start of line 3.

i do like the imagery and similies:
"loose-limbed", "clinging", "flapping", "slick...like sweaty skin", and my favorite " dance a blissful drunken shrug".
lines 3-7 very successfully animate the clothing as much as the wind would.

a few nitpicks as indicated, but good work.




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