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The Mandarin (Free verse) by Caducus

A half peeled mandarin brought it home to me She had left me. It laid next to the ring I gave her And five years of notes I wrote her, The kind only women keep. I walked upstairs noticing the vacuum cleaner Still warm from principal And in the bedroom laid where she woke Were 13 photo frames Face down like the way she liked to be fucked, She left only one of me standing. In the picture I was being held by my Father On a beach I don’t recall But I never forgot that image, It comes to me when I’m loving Yet never when I fuck And I smell mandarins whenever I’m alone

INTRANSIT 12-Oct-06/7:24 AM
Line one delete- to me and insert 2 dashes
same for line four (I wrote her) can go for two dashes.
Drop (noticing), drop laid,drop yet,drop and.

There's still something missing from the parts dealing with your father. Can't pinpoint it yet. Good to see you still plugging away. Fuckin' rough aint it?




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