Replying to a comment on:

None (Free verse) by poemreader

They don't deserve this They are way too young Two of four children Including me as one It wasn't supposed to be this way for them They were to have a better life And all because of one person They will never have that life I miss them and love them so very much I would do anything and everything for them They are my two biggest buddies And will always be there for me till the end They'll always be my brothers No matter what people say No one can take my place ever I love them in each and every way.

nentwined 11-Sep-02/10:16 AM
I'm confused. Oh, I see -- I was reading "two of four children, including me as one" to mean you were one of the two... which made the rest of the poem very skewed.

The actual rhythm of the poem I find overly halting, stopstarting, and repetitive -- it drones.

I'm left mildly curious as to what's happened to or with them.




Track and Plan your submissions ; Read some Comics ; Get Paid for your Poetry
PoemRanker Copyright © 2001 - 2024 - kaolin fire - All Rights Reserved
All poems Copyright © their respective authors
An internet tradition since June 9, 2001